Can you become a Yazidi?

The question almost always comes in a friendly way. Someone has read something about the Yazidis, found it nice, and asks whether they could join. The answer, however, is no.

The rule

You are born a Yazidi. Both parents must be Yazidi — father and mother. Then you are one, without having to do anything for it.

There is no way in from the outside. No test, no profession of faith, no course you take to then belong. There are also no exceptions for good people, for spouses, or for longtime friends.

And there is no mission. No one has ever tried to convince others of Yazidism. No one stands at doors. This is not restraint — it simply does not occur in this religion.

Why

There are two reasons for this, and the second one is the more uncomfortable.

The first: It does not align with their self-conception. A religion that knows no holy book and whose knowledge has been passed down orally through generations does not see itself as an offer to be accepted, but as an origin in which one stands.

The second: Those who are small and are repeatedly attacked eventually close themselves off. A community that one can enter from the outside can also be dissolved from the outside — from within. The Yazidis have never risked that. That is not fear. Fear is when nothing has happened.

What this rule costs

One cannot explain it without mentioning the price. The community is not growing. It is getting smaller, year after year.

Young Yazidis in Germany fall in love, just like young people everywhere fall in love. Then, in some kitchen, a family is crying, and both sides have their reasons. Some families endure it. In others, a mother no longer calls her child. Both happen, and both happen among people who like one another.

The dispute that truly exists

Anyone who reads on the internet that the matter is settled is reading someone who speaks for one side. Within the community, this is currently being openly debated — not in forums, but in families, and at higher levels too.

One side says: A rule is a rule; otherwise, it is not one. The other says: If we hold on to this in the diaspora, in three generations we will no longer exist.

Especially controversial is the case where only one parent is Yazidi. There, the dividing line does not run between believers and doubters, but right through the middle of families.

Anyone wanting a clear answer will not get one. The dispute is open — and it is honest.

What the answer does not mean

It says nothing about the person who asked. It does not mean someone is worse. It does not mean they are unwanted. It means: This is a door that does not exist — not even for good people.

And it has a flip side that is rarely counted: Throughout history, no Yazidi has ever made someone one of them who did not want it. That is no achievement. It simply belongs to the same rule — you cannot have one part and leave out the other.

Where this is written in more detail

In ÊZÎDÎ — What we really believe this question is in the third chapter, and it is not asked by a stranger, but by a classmate on the way to the bus stop. That makes it harder to answer, not easier.